| So. Not finals. |
[Dec. 10th, 2006|06:45 pm] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | A Static Lullaby | ] |
I am only doing this because I am bored as fuck, don't want to study for finals, and...it seemed nice. I don't know.
1. List twenty things you wish you could say to people but can't. You can list the same people repeatedly.
2. Don't say who they are.
3. Never discuss it again.
( hot damn. ) |
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| Punchy. |
[Jun. 30th, 2006|12:01 am] |
Apparently I need to do this. Go figure.
All I'm going to say is that I am very angry that I am working at Panera.
And I am incredibly amused by the fact that my laptop is PORTABLE. |
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| Um. Hey there. |
[Jun. 29th, 2006|02:50 pm] |
Is it worth it to start writing in this thing again? I feel like it's been abandoned by most people, so I'm not even sure if it'd be worth it. Plus, my summer isn't that exciting.
It's up to everyone else. God knows I can't make decisions for myself. |
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| Flipped. |
[Feb. 20th, 2006|04:21 pm] |
Wow.
Today has been thoroughly mediocre. Just like this whole weekend. Only change "thoroughly mediocre" to "a fat load of shit".
Spent most of Friday hating everthing and everyone for various reasons. Spent most of Saturday trying to convince myself that I wasn't really THAT sick or THAT pathetic or THAT disconnected. Spent most of Sunday admitting to myself that I am all those things. Spent most of today watching Scrubs on DVD and praying for an exit. Still no luck.
I hate being sick. I feel like shit, I sleep when I can. I was up at four thirty this morning, when I took twice as much Tylenol as I was supposed to in a desperate attempt to make myself tired. Washed said Tylenol down with a Diet Coke. Caffeine counteracted medicine. I was still awake. Watched more Scrubs. It stopped being funny after the 15th episode.
I feel so disgusting right now. I took a shower, but apparently the feeling doesn't just go skin deep. I've had to figure out a lot of things lately, and as per usual nobody knows the full story. My excuse for my behavior is that--
--oh wait. That's right. I haven't figured out the reason yet.
I just got fed up with my life. For a brief period of time, I allowed myself to wallow in self-pity and be discontent with the way that things are going for me lately. As shitty as this has made me feel, I think that in some strange way it was necessary for me to disconnect for a little while, just so I could figure out where I was without any outside factors affecting anything.
It's getting better, I guess.
But then again, who really knows. |
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| Countdown to Extinction |
[Feb. 19th, 2006|07:18 am] |
When I called in to work a few minutes ago, because I've been up since four in the morning hacking up a lung, the manager told me to call him back at noon and tell him if I'm feeling any better. Because he needs me to come into work.
This is why Panera is so sensitive to it's workers needs. |
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| Sorry. |
[Feb. 5th, 2006|09:34 pm] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | APOCOLYPSE WOW, reggie and the full effect | ] |
Yeah. This livejournal is pretty neglected...I have it set as my homepage, but I might as well just set my homepage to Myspace because that's where I automatically go anyway.
I am so exhausted. Work, luckily, wasn't too bad because I got off about two hours earlier than I was supposed to. That was pretty nice, I guess, but I really could use the money at this point. Once I return my Panic! shirt, though, I should have a little more cash. Which is a plus, I suppose.
No school tomorrow for Molly because she's going to go visit ISU. Three meetings for a total of one hour of effort. I have to drive both ways, though, because I am suffering from extreme highway inexperience. Blech.
Last night was fun. Although I checked everyone's Myspaces and with the exception of one "Secret Show", nobody's playing in Naperville for an extended period of time. So it looks like our spree of local shows is over. I guess it was fun, while it lasted.
Joy. All of my brother's friends are finally leaving. They're pretty nice, I guess, but most of them are so. Fucking. Loud. And by most, I mean all. Wonderful.
Oh yeah. I just got out of bed a few minutes ago after laying down for an hour and not being able to fall asleep. I also read an entire (mediocre at best) book this evening. Somebody find me something to do.
I'm going to go attempt to keep myself entertained until I get tired enough to attempt sleep again. Talk to you peeps laterzzz!!!1one. |
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| Tightrope walking isn't for clowns. |
[Jan. 27th, 2006|10:05 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | Sick and tired. | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | P!atD | ] |
I don't know why I'm so down today. Overall, the day wasn't so bad. School was alright, lunch was pretty fun...but my house is a nightmare. I slept from four in the afternoon until about eight, only to be woken up by my mother who was (shock of the century) harassing me about my scholarship applications. Lovely to see you too, mom. I love how it never occured to her that I might be feeling poorly, because you know, normal and healthy people don't sleep fifteen hours a day. I may be a teenager, but honestly...that's pretty weird. So, I get up, get on the computer, and all that I've managed to do over the past two to three hours is watch the "I Write Sins, not Tragedies" music video at least a dozen times and check my email compulsively for new livejournal/myspace comments that get sent to me. This is pathetic and disgusting. My sister, unfortunately, was sent some idiotic soundtrack from some disney channel movie and has insisted upon doing nothing but screech the words into her karaoke machine since she got it. This is the primary reason that I slept in the basement this afternoon.
So anyway, I guess the long and short of it is that I'm under house arrest until I get these stupid things done. Catch you guys later. |
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| Come on baby, you're my best fix. |
[Jan. 21st, 2006|01:59 pm] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | LOVE IN A TRASHCAN, the raveonettes | ] |
Seeing as I have nothing better to do....
Yesterday was thoroughly mediocre. Underworld: Evolutions is a waste of money, I do not recommend it. Lots of useless sex and violence...so if you're into that, go for it. Then we went to Portillos, which was actually pretty fun ("Say Linguini!" "...Linguini?") but we definately overstayed our welcome...by about an hour. Yash's wrestling meet was okay, if a little smelly, and we ended up leaving at about nine thirty. By this point, the roads were a total mess on account of the snow so we dropped Hayley at home and I ended up staying at Nannetti's house because I didn't wanted to drive all the way home. Watched Girl, Interrupted which is very sad. Yes, sad Alyssa. Don't ask questions.
Today, hopefully, will be better. I'm staying over @ Nannetti's again after a long, trying day of work (uh...and by that I mean four whole hours. Yep.) Then, movie fest? I'll call you guys to see what I should bring....
....in addition to Zelda. OOH! We should beat the boss on the file me and Chuck already started. That would be pretty nifty, because I am hecka awesome at the boss part, with the reflective sword...
I need. To get. Some real. Friends.
That aren't named Link. Or Zelda. |
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| (no subject) |
[Jan. 20th, 2006|11:02 am] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | THE LAST SUNRISE, aiden | ] |
I think I stared at the "Update Journal" screen for at least fifteen minutes before actually deciding to write something.
I know Hayley said she's writing something about last night, but that doesn't mean I still won't write about it, haha. It was so much fun. Honestly, I haven't felt that comfortable in my own skin in a very long time. Arrowhead Park at night has its own comforting qualities, and if you lay ontop of the hill and look at the stars you get a truly unique perspective on life...especially when you're deciding which Pokemon everybody is. Swinging on the swings is fun, because I can watch my friends and feel like, for the first time in a very long time, nothing is wrong. And I will bet that we can never recreate that moment again, but it was wonderful while it lasted.
Today will be fun. Underworld: Evolutions is, to this date, the only vampire obsession that my friends will tolerate. I am grateful for that...plus, we're all huge liars if we say Scott Speedman isn't hot.
See you guys today. |
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| New Screenname. |
[Jan. 17th, 2006|05:15 pm] |
HolyCowBatman013.
This is my new screenname. Please use it. |
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| Huh. |
[Jan. 16th, 2006|03:05 pm] |
I'm thinking of starting a friends only writing journal on here.
Would anybody read it? |
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| Cranial Dislocation |
[Jan. 15th, 2006|01:26 pm] |
This morning has been going in slow motion, and I am moving faster than everything else.
Where was the option of slowing down? I hate that I miss things. |
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| Apocalypse Now |
[Jan. 14th, 2006|11:26 am] |
Wow.
I was right about one thing: When it's good, it's really good. But when it's bad, its hell. |
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| Skeptics and True Believers...guess which one I am. |
[Jan. 12th, 2006|04:02 pm] |
Sorry for not updating in...forever, according to Alyssa. I can't even find the time to write in my REAL journal, let alone this one. So sorry to the two people that actually read this.
I think this weekend has great potential to be truely awesome or a true disaster. I guess it's all in what we make of it, but what once was pure and unadulterated excitement is now a sort of hybrid of enthusiasm and dread. I kind of hate that.
After this weekend dies down, however, I can honestly say that nothing good is going to happen to me until March. At that point, I get to escape from school and Naperville for a few days, WITH THE FAMILY. Is it pathetic that I want so badly to get out of here that I'll even put up with my siblings and parents for a stretch of five days?
Don't answer that question.
Monday is going to suck. As is today. And tomorrow until third period, where (hopefully) I won't have to present the speech that I am in no way prepared for. Excellent.
Catch you all later. Maybe. |
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| The guerilla terrorist of teenage romance. |
[Jan. 3rd, 2006|03:29 pm] |
Wow. Today has been like an episode of The Twilight Zone, only not as severe and way less exciting.
Couldn't fall asleep until four in the morning, regardless of the fact that I went to bed at midnight. Slept from four until five, then woke up and stayed up from five until six. At six, I fell back asleep only to sleep through my alarm, thereby giving myself exactly twenty minutes to shower and dress for the day. To which I say: Fuck that.
School was truly mediocre. For once I didn't fuck up everything in ceramics, which is a plus (of sorts). Gym, Brit Lit, blah blah blah. Lunch was fine, Consumer Ed was utter hell, AP Stats wasn't as bad as I'd anticipated, and I spent all of seventh period doing Sudoku puzzles that Anne Turner was giving me.
Went to Panera to pick up my paycheck, went to the bank and got on the phone with my mother who, naturally, asked about all my finals. What I got was an A, B, D and F. Fantastic, a real over-achiever I am. But when I told her all this, she wasn't worried at all. This is by far the strangest thing that's happened to me recently. Hands down. My mother is like a grade Nazi. But I suppose I should just be grateful.
Work from five until close tonight, but I'm in bakery so it's not so bad. I have to do that stupid Consumer Ed assignment, however. Not looking forward to that one so much. And does anybody know what the hell is going on in Brit Lit? I don't even know what the project is, let alone when it's due. Great.
I should probably get started on that. Yeah. |
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| Childhood ends the moment you realize you're going to die. |
[Jan. 1st, 2006|05:37 pm] |
My new years resolutions:
1. Write a story I don't feel like finishing immediately after I start it.
2. Stop apologizing to avoid confrontation.
3. Find a boy that's worth my time.
4. Make new friends, keep the old ones.
5. Don't be pathetic.
6. Be myself, don't change based on where I am or who I'm with.
7. Tolerate my extended family.
8. Stop being such a coward.
9. Start accepting the fact that people drink and be okay with it, even though I don't.
10. Be happier. God knows I need it.
11. Find a religion I can truly believe in.
12. Stop being so concerned with the mainstream and how to stay out of it.
13. Figure out what I'm going to do with my life. |
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| A toast to the little things. |
[Dec. 29th, 2005|05:53 pm] |
I WROTE SOMETHING!
I WROTE SOMETHING!
I WROTE SOMETHING!
I WROTE SOMETHING!
I WROTE SOMETHING!
I WROTE SOMETHING!
I WROTE SOMETHING!
I WROTE SOMETHING!
I WROTE SOMETHING!
I WROTE SOMETHING!
I WROTE SOMETHING!
I WROTE SOMETHING!
I WROTE SOMETHING!
Okay, so it's not actually done yet. But I'm so pleased with myself. |
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| Is that a new sweater? My you're looking obese today. |
[Dec. 27th, 2005|08:46 pm] |
Today was a shitty day.
Woke up at the crack of eleven when my mother announced that we were leaving to go bowling in fourty-five minutes. Scrambled into the shower, got dressed, and piled into the van for two and a half hours of fun-filled pin slaughtering. As if that weren't excruciating enough, I had cousins harassing me constantly through the whole process. Afterwards, I accompanied Chuck to the barber where his hairdresser, who was apparently on CRACK, asked him if I was his wife. I just about threw up right then and there. So, then I get home, go pick up Steph, and eat dinner at Panera. That part was alright. Turns out there's this Holiday banquet on the fifteenth and me and Steph are planning on going together, unless something comes up. But Eric was being a complete dick. He kept telling me that I wasn't doing a good job in dining room. Lucky for me, Brian let me go (finally) but seriously, it was a load of shit. And to top it all off, I don't know if I'm supposed to come into work tomorrow, so I have to call Amy before ten in order to find out. This implys that I'd have to get up before ten. THIS BLOWS.
I need to write something. |
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| Brokeback Kong! |
[Dec. 26th, 2005|06:15 pm] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | Bullets and Octane | ] |
Saw Brokeback Mountain today with Hayley. I've got mixed feelings on it....I think if you're a flagrant homophobe you should see it, because it'll teach you a lesson, but I think if you're already accepting of the gay lifestyle that the message might be redundant. It was mediocre to me....although some parts, admittedly, were pretty gut-wrenchingly sad. Not the feel-good movie of the year, to say the least.
The next few days should be relatively awful. There's exactly eleven people staying at my house at the moment, and I'm the kind of girl that likes my alone time. Sad part is that I'm not allowed to leave. FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, EVERYONE NEEDS TO COME HOME!
People keep walking through here. My privacy is being raped.
Somebody please call me. PLEASE. PLEASE. PLEASE. |
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| (no subject) |
[Dec. 25th, 2005|07:43 pm] |
I've just seen my new favorite movie.
This Christmas is now officially good. |
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joli_cadavre13's journal
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